Hi guys, today’s post is going to be really personal and I’ve been playing with the idea to write it for a really long time, but as with posts like these there is always fear of judgement and negative remarks but today I have enough courage to just finally do it.
I’ve been struggling with my weight since I hit puberty at the age of 10, I was skinny as kid, I was of average weight for my age and height but as soon as those hormones started doing their thing I started gaining, and it wasn’t because I was stuffing my face as many people would like to believe.
I got my period when I turned 12, during the time when my dad passed away from brain cancer, but after that my period never came regularly, we shrugged if off due to the fact that it started during a dramatic time in my life and it could take up to 5 years for a girls period to become “normal”. Over the years the weight just accumulated and I went through high school as a fat kid, I tried dieting but the weight loss would be extremely slow and really discouraging. After high school when my period still didn’t come regularly it was time to go see the Doctor and I was referred to the endocrine department at the Pretoria academic hospital, countless tests later and some self re-search I was officially diagnosed with PCOS.
What is PCOS you ask ? (Source: Mayoclinic.org)
Infrequent or prolonged menstrual periods, excess hair growth, acne, and obesity can all occur in women with polycystic ovary syndrome. In adolescents, infrequent or absent menstruation may raise suspicion for the condition
To be diagnosed with the condition, your doctor looks for at least two of the following:
- Irregular periods. This is the most common characteristic. Examples include menstrual intervals longer than 35 days; fewer than eight menstrual cycles a year; failure to menstruate for four months or longer; and prolonged periods that may be scant or heavy.
- Excess androgen. Elevated levels of male hormones (androgens) may result in physical signs, such as excess facial and body hair (hirsutism), adult acne or severe adolescent acne, and male-pattern baldness (androgenic alopecia).
- Polycystic ovaries. Polycystic ovaries become enlarged and contain numerous small fluid-filled sacs which surround the eggs.
So we discovered the source of my weight gain, it’s a medical condition that screws with my hormones. I proceeded to try diets that wouldn’t work and joined weighless a couple of times only to drop out after a couple of months. I decided to give weighless one more try when I was around 25 / 26, this time I opted mostly for their low GI options and to my surprise I lost the weight and I was loosing it fast. I lost close to 25kg in 6 months and I was super proud of myself, I joined the gym and loved it and I was finally able to shop for smaller clothes and clothes I used to wear in high school fit me again! But this is where everything started going haywire.
I woke up one morning at 3am with the worst pains I’ve felt in my life, I was absolutely convinced that I am dying, after some visits to the Doctor and getting a sonar done it’s confirmed, I have gallstones due to the lack of fat in my diet. After a couple of months and more gallbladder attacks they finally decide to take out my gallbladder. Afterwards I was very limited to what I can eat and I developed IBS to top it off. Needless to say I gained the weight back. I tried going back to weighless but was not able to shake the weight as I did before the cholecystectomy and it made me feel like a failure.
I’m not giving up my battle with my weight, I’ve recently started on medication prescribed by my new doctor for helping my sugar levels to aid in weight loss and I am planning on visiting a dietitian who can possibly help me work out a diet that will suit my dietary needs and concerns.
But I am here today, tired, tired of ignorant people who find it easy to troll the internet and make their remarks, not towards me personally but towards anyone who is overweight, tired of people staring and pointing. Just remember when you see a fat person on the internet, on the street, that it is still a person, a person with feelings and a person with a story. So unless you read the book don’t judge its cover.